i enjoyed attending Mass today. i'm not sure why - but i believe the hymns were nice, and the readings from the Bible and the homily were relevent (and set me thinking). But again, we don't go to Mass because of the Music, or because of the reading, or because of the good preacher, we go to Mass because of Jesus - to listen to Him, to meet Him, to receive Him, in other words, to worship Him, no matter how poor the music, how lousy the sermon (and how boring the service may be). It's our date with the Lord, and who would miss a date with someone special?.
You see, many times when i attend Holy Mass, i just feel so dry - even though the spiritual value of every Mass i attend is actually the same. But today, when we recited the 'prayer of a worshipping community', i made an effort to really mean what i pray. i think tat made a lot of difference too, since the prayer was "...and empowered by Your Holy Spirit, we may participate fully, actively and conciously in this Sacrifice of the Mass..."
Two songs in particular touched my heart. They are, "Praise You Lord" (EX 69) and "O LOrd You're Beautiful" (EX 87). The first song had a jazzy tune and it was the fourth verse which struck me:
"Praise You Lord
You have turned
our thorns to roses
Glory, Lord,
as they bloom upon Your brow
The path of pain is hallowed
For Your love has made it sweet
Praise You Lord
And may i love You now"
It is easy to think that the phrase "You have turned our thorns to roses" means God took away our pain/difficulties/problems. But the song did not say that. It says He turned our thorns to roses - with Him, our problem becomes more bearable, or at least He helps us face our difficulties. Now we can embrace 'the rose', because before this, to embrace 'the thorn' is a rather impossible thing to do. And as we sing further, the song says "The path of pain is hallowed, For Your love has made it sweet", i see this as a reminder for me that suffering can have meaning when we offer it up to God. Because Jesus came and suffered on the cross, now the cross has meaning. Before this, the cross was a symbol of sin and crime. But now, it is the symbol of 'loving redemptive suffering'. And Jesus asked us to take up our crosses (which is a hard thing to do), if we truly want to follow Him (c.f. Mat 10:38, Lk 14:27, Mat 16:24, Mk 8:34, Lk 9:23). Sop i began to think of the problems/difficultes that i am facing, and decided to surrender and offer it to God, and with His grace and strength to endure it (even though at the corner of my heart i still pray "Lord if you could take this cup away from me", but nevertheless, not my will, but Yours be done), and stil love HIm no matter what the situation.
The chorus of the second song goes like this:
"i want to take Your Word
and shine it all around
But first help me
just to live it Lord
And when i'm doing well
help me never seek a crown
for my reward
is giving glory to You"
Many times, i burn with zeal to spread the Gospel - to share it with others. But before i do so, i need to check myself: "is the Gospel reflected in my life?". And another question: "What is my purpose of sharing the Gospel? After sharing the Good News, do i become proud?" The second song pretty much answers my question and summarizes the zeal that i have, and it becomes my prayer too - tat in all i do, even when spreading the Gospel, i live by its standard, and i do it not for my own glory, but I DO IT THAT GOD MAY BE GLORIFIED, and should i gain any praise, LET IT GO TO CALVARY!
Today's reading were taken from the book of Job 7:1-4,6-7; 1 Cor 9:16-19,22-23 while the Gspel was from Mark 1:29-39.
In the first reading, Job was complaining that our life on earth is just like a slave - we work and toil as though for no concrete reason. In the night, we can't wait for dawn, in the day, we can't wait for evening. And the verse which set me thinking (after Fr. Vincent stressed on it) was "Remember that my life is but a breath..." That verse - i always viewed it in a poetic sense - it's a just a way to descibe the shortness of life. But today, i realised that the verse can be taken literally as well. When Fr. said that our life is indeed a breath and when further to tell us to try to take a breath and hold it or breath out and hold, i realised that if i took a breath, and held my breath, and decided not to breath again, my life is gone! Is just takes a breath to sustain the next few seconds of my life. Wow! - how i took breathing for granted.
The second reading touched me because the opening sentence said "I do not boast of preaching the Gospel, since it is a duty which has been laid on me; I should be punished if I did not preach it!" Fr. went on to preach that is it our duty to preach the Gospel to others. btw, i really admired St. Paul who was himself a great preacher of the Gospel, and how he made himself to go to everyone's level and preach to them about the Good News of Jesus.
As i was pondering on the two readings, how different the outlook of the 2 authors - one sees that work seems to be vain, the other seem to work tirelessly for the Gospel - so i concluded that, in all that we do, and if God is in that work (or rather if we have God in our lives), work is so different. In all we do, we work for God (whcih is another hard thing to do).
Anyway, in the Gospel, Fr pointed out that it is the most important thing for us to listen to Christ's preaching. Miracles and healings are secondary, but still make a very important part of Christ ministry, because Christ main purpose for coming was to preach. This can be seen in the conversation Jesus had with His disciples after He performed many healings: "...and when they found Him they said, 'Everybody is looking for you'. He answered, 'Let us go elsewhere, to the neighboring country towns, so that I can preach there too, because that is why I came'". So i reckon that first and foremost, it is very important for us to listen to sound teaching, to preaching that is correct. After all, Jesus said if we abide in His word, we are truly His disciples, and we willknow the truth and it is the truth that sets us free (c.f. John 8:31-32).
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Dear Lord, thank you for today. Thank you for your constant love, and for coming into our lives, not only spiritually, but physically as well through Your most Precious Body and Blood which we recive at Holy communion. PLs help all of us to remain in Your love, and let us never be separated from YOu. i pray for the repentance of sinners, for the conversion of non-believers, and also for he strengtening of those who are already in Your grace, that we may all love You with our whole beings and also love our neighbors as ourselves. Only by Your grace can we do so O lord, and we choose to cooperate with that grace and help. Thank and Praise You Jesus, for we ask this in Your Name. Amen!
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